The Whores of 305

That's what my roommates and I have decided to call ourselves. We have a theme song too. You know the "boys in motion" song from That's So Raven...Well....

We are the whores in motion. We give you are devotion. *whores* We are the whores in motion. WE GIVE YOU OUR DEVOTION.

Carrying on. (that may have been hard to sing in your head if you are unfamiliar with the show of my middle school years...look it up would ya?)

I really like my roommates. Zero drama and they make me laugh. (Abi's probably reading this right now and just filling up with pride. Shut that pride down Abi. SHUT IT DOWN)

Yesterday kind of sucked. I don't know why, but it just did. Sometimes days up here are the worst, sometimes they are the best, but then sometimes they are the worst. But when I come home, I do nothing but laugh. It's the best place to be in all of the places to ever be!

I think the highlights were mainly from last night. I came home from a rough day of soccer practice and some sadness deep within my soul, but everything brightened up when we started acting out the play of....

*bright lights. Camera rolling. Marker and ACTION*

The Tales of Sleeping Average and Prince Ehhh-Not-My-First-Choice.

Thus begins the mediocre adventures of two semi-attractive people that don't really have have any sort of special skills or anything.

Look! In thine yonder distance! Prince Ehh-Not-My-First-Choice has arrived to wake Sleeping Average from her...uh...nap.  The hoofs are beating loudly on the concrete as this prince gallops in on a gorgeously maintained...donkey?

*Scene*

Anyways. You get the point. Then I tried to teach my roommates how to perfect the stare dance.

Step 1: Eyes open, not wide, but not squinty. (squinting can be seductive, or as Tyra likes to say, smizing can be seductive...stay clear of that).

Step 2: Turn your head slightly toward your right or your left simply leaving a slight view of your profile (however this can be adjusted throughout the dance if necessary). This is key to success.

Step 3: MAINTAIN EYE CONTACT. FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GREEN AND GOOD ON THIS EARTH DO NOT BREAK EYE CONTACT.

Step 4: Begin to move your body in any way you would like. Personally, I am a fan of rolling my shoulders backwards in small circular motions, but to each their own. If you feel more comfortable, you may try keeping your hands stiff and slowly, yet softly, karate chopping the air (in every direction: above you, to the side of you, what have you!)

Step 5: Let the games begin! Be creative! This is your time to shine. Don't let that love interest get away!

All and all, I have fun with them. They can put up with my weirdness, which is saying a lot. Most people can handle it in small doses, but these people LIVE WITH ME.

These poor girls.....Oh wait. These poor whores.

FINE. I'll blog. I guess...

That wasn't a passive aggressive title in the least. THE LEAST.

College is weird sometimes. Because all the sudden everything is different. And I mean e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g.   (that was probably unnecessary)

Now. For a story. A story of a college experience. An experience that will be understood by the many generations to follow. A story of bravery. A story of understanding. But mostly, a story about a wet, wet kiss. Read on dear readers.

The night was young. The date? Well I just don't remember anymore. (actually it was Sept. 1, 2012 at about 12:15 p.m.).

The rain poured down upon the small college town of Logan, Utah. Jeannie Woller, a young, attractive,  talented, vivacious, intelligent, witty, dramatic.....

WE GET IT

Right. Right. Well.

Jeannie, Maris, and Lexie all stood amazed as they began to witness their first "True Aggie" night.

What's that? You don't know what "True Aggie" is? Let me explain before I continue on with this story that will keep you guessing at every turn!

Becoming a True Aggie is when you kiss, at midnight, atop of this...

BUT. You can only become a true aggie if you kiss one who has already been deemed a "True Aggie". OH. It's also only under a full moon (and on Homecoming, but that's stupid)

Carrying on.

So I was standing there. In the pouring rain, looking like a fool with pink eye shadow practically past my eyebrow (it was an 80's dance, promise!) And I was asking Mare and Lex.

"Guys should I? I mean I've haven't kissed yet! You know? Should I do it?"
Both replied something like "Ya. ya man. Fo sho. Do it. You won't regret it. Go on! Take a leap. Just enjoy college. It's college times!".......er something like that.

College times. How can you say no after someone said it's college times. You just can't!
I walked up to this kid, who's name shall stay unknown, and just kind of stood next to him for a moment. Then I took a deep breath, while rocking back and forth on my toes and just kind of spit out...

"Hey Andy, (DAMNIT). Are you a True Aggie?"
"You know it!" He practically rolled his eyes at the question.
"Well. Uh. Well. Do you wanna make me one?"

It was like I was freaking asking him to turn me into a Vampire! Vampyre? (autocorrect didn't even red underline that spelling of it. Wahoo!)

So we get in line. All the other couples in front of us are making googely eyes at each other.
Oh we're so in love. Let us profess our love through public kissing on top of an A!
JUST SHUT UP.

But there was something I had to tell Andy first. Before he decided to take this leap with me.
"Andy."
"Ya?"
"I have to tell you something first, and after you hear it you can decide whether or not you want to bail out."
*nervously* "Okay?"
"This will be my first kiss."
"WHAT?!" He practically jumped in the air.
"Awesome! No worries. This will be great!"

He told me this elaborate plan. It was brilliant! Nothing had ever been so well thought out in this entire universe, well except for that one time Nick Cage stole the Declaration of Independence.

We walk up on the A, nerves shaking through my entire body, and we fulfill the plan.

*SIDENOTE* Andy is a tall man. Maybe 6 foot 6. 6'7"?

I jumped. I probably could've dunked a basketball with how high I jumped. And I wrapped my legs around his back. (I would use the word straddle, but it sounds weird), and hooked my arms together around his neck. As Bridesmaids would say. I climbed that like a tree.
Andy then leaned his head back, about as far as Nearly Headless Nick could, and dramatically spit the gum from his mouth. From there...

MOISTURE. Everywhere. I also found out I did everything wrong. Don't pucker. They may do it in movies, but it's not suppose to happen in real life. Also I pulled out before he did.

*my mind* Sorry. Sorry sorry sorry. *goes back in to continue the kiss*

I'm a bad kisser. But he should have expect that! It was my first one! (well kind of. But that's a story for another time)

Last thing that I need to add. 3 checks go with most historical first kiss ever.
1. Under a full/blue moon.
2. Pouring Rain.
3. True Aggie.

Check and Mate.

Enjoy this.

You think your first day of school was good...psh!

The day began early for me. While many other new college students had the extreme luxury of sleeping in till a semi-decent hour, my day began at the crack of dawn...well more like 6:30 A.M., but still. I didn't mind though. The breeze as I biked to school was nice on my freshly sun-burnt face. I was feeling good and ready for the day. I could take on anything! Go on give me something! I'll do it! You want me to dance with a King Cobra? Where's the music, huh? Oh what else do want me to do? You want me to take the One Ring to Mordor? Give me some Mithril and...No wait! I'll go without it! 

That's how ready. 

I spent time the night before mapping out where I needed to be, and by when. English 1010. This building. This time. Managing family and business. This building blah blah...etc etc.  Everything that I needed was in the palm of my hand. Or I guess it was zipped up in my backpack, but it could have just as easily been in the palm of my hand. My warm, sweaty hand. (boys wanna hold it all day long. Word) So I biked around a bit till I found the right building. I was far too prideful to actually pull out the map I studied to find the location of the building. I didn't want it to be too obvious I was a freshman. I had to give myself some sort of a chance to get people to talk to me.

Feeling like an absolute college kid, I locked up my bike and (I may or may not have) strutted into the building. Then all the sudden...

*Epiphany*
(in Jeannie's mind) "I don't know what room my class is in. Shoot. Shoot. Okay. You're fine Jeannie. Not a problem. Just act like you know what you're doing! Confidence. Confidence is key. Hey look! He looks like a person that would be going to an English class....Ima just follow him real quick."
So I stalked this boy. Straight up stalked. But not scary stalking. So not too close on his heals where it would be obvious that I was watching his every movement, but not far enough away that if he sneezed I wouldn't be able to jump in with a creepy bless you. We walked into a classroom about fifteen minutes before class was suppose to start. I was being a good kid! Being early and what not. Ya know. Maybe I'd make some friends er something. Flirt with a cute boy. Hold hands with him if the time was right. Lock lips. Heck, maybe even get married. Who knows! I'm just saying, a lot can happen in a quarter of an hour. Then the teacher came in and began handing out papers. The whole while I just kept thinking, 

"This might not even be my class. What if it's not? I'll be in here and my actual class will be going crazy with worriment! They'll be all, 'where Jeannie at?' Then rumors will come into play, and they'll be something along the lines of "Oh Jeannie, I heard she really believed Hogwarts was a place and so she refused to go to any school that wasn't Hogwarts." "No way! I heard she refused to shave her legs so the soccer team killed her. They just up and killed her. Cold blood. There is an investigation going on right now."

Oh shoot. Now maybe I'm the one making up rumors. ANYWAYS.

I finally asked the teacher if I was on the roll. Turns out I wasn't, and I ended up being that awkward kid who gets up in the middle of class with everything in their hands, and just kind of scurries out of the room. Yup. That was me. First day. First class. First real college experience. 

Other than that though. My first day was full of happiness and memories. Full of stories that I can tell my children that will then tell their children and they will tell theirs, and so on and so forth, forever and ever! I also didn't have any homework my first day. Fantastic! However, now I do. Now I have lots. 

The name's Jeannie. And I am a Utah State Aggie. Cheers! 

P.S. Hogwarts IS real. I just know it. 

(p.s. Sorry I suck at updating this constantly *coughLindicough*. I'm gonna get better! Especially because I have a story that I think will entertain, plus a picture to go along with it)